The Answer To The Question:

Because.

Ok. I guess that's probably not going to cut it. The actual answer is that I found out in June that any content you put on here becomes property of Google/Bill Gates and I just wasn't into that. I am working on my book which I hope someday to get published as proof that miracles DO still happen, and when I do, I don't want Bill Gates coming after me saying he holds copyright on all my best material.

Pipe dream. I know. But still....

Oh yeah- the question: "How come you never blog anymore?"
I need my own website.

Guess We Let the Cat Out of the Bag

Little Mommy(10) is playing soccer and I am so excited to do all the soccer-mom stuff I've been missing for the last couple of years. We went to the sporting goods store a few days ago and got her everything she is going to need. (Cleats, shin guards, socks, extra socks, ball, bag to carry her stuff, etc.) Then the other kids talked me into a bat, 3 baseballs, 1 rubber ball, and some other stuff. Husband knew we were getting shoes and shinguards but the rest was going to be a little bit of a tough sell once we got home. The kids and I have had a wonderful time playing through the last few days. I had asked LittleMommy(10) not to tell him about the extra stuff until I had the chance to tell him myself. Then I forgot so he got the news by seeing the stuff she had with her at Bubba's cubscout pack meeting last night. Oops. Guess the cat is out of the bag. He was only slightly annoyed with me so that was good.

Yesterday at Bubba's(8) cubscout Pack Meeting Little Mommy(10) found a kitty in a tree and she rescued it. This is great news outside of the fact that I am not only allergic to cats, but a dedicated hater of them as well. Husband joins me in my passionate dislike for all things feline. We just aren't cat people. When I saw LittleMommy(10) carrying that cat around I told her it was very cute but that she needed to put it down, go home, put her clothes straight into the washer, and take a shower so that I could go home eventually. She jumped up and started for home right away like the obedient child that she is. Oh- except for the part when she stuffed the cat into her brand-new soccer bag and smuggled it home with her. Once she reached home she realized the best thing to do would be to stow the kitty away in the garage so that she could love it and keep it and call it George or something. Under a plastic 5-gallon bucket. With a table set on top for good measure. (Wouldn't want the kitty to breathe or maybe grow opposable thumbs and then get away. It might starve in the event that the countryside runs out of mice or voles. And then what would we do? One less cat in the world.) Lucky for Skimbleshanks he mews VERY LOUDLY and Husband figured out what was going on about two minutes after the benevolent imprisonment commenced. Kitty was set free but not before he became permanently attached to the residence. This situation was not improved when ThePinkiest(6) got out one of my best dishes and gave the willing captive a drink on the porch. Mr.Buttons hung around for three or four more hours after that. I ended up having to leave the premises while my sweet babboo de-hair/de-dandered the house, kids, clothes, and brand-new soccer bag. Ahhhhh LittleMommy(10). Stinkin' Little Punk. : )

Literally. You smell like cat. : )

NOTICE: IF YOU ARE MISSING YOUR CUTE LITTLE FUZZY KITTY, WE DON'T KNOW NOTHING ABOUT THAT. OH- SORRY TOO.

Summertime Public Service Announcement

I was reminded of this, and now I am reminding you.


Alright ladies, it's that time of year once again!!! I think we need to be reminded of a few things. So my sisters, PLEASE, raise your big toes and repeat after me... (see below)





The Open Toed Shoe Pledge



As a member of the Cute Girl Sisterhood, I pledge to follow the Rules when wearing sandals and other open-toe shoes:

• I promise to always wear sandals that fit. My toes will not hang over and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs and the sides and tops of my feet will not pudge out between the straps.
• I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free. I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe.
• I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow.
• I will shave the hairs off my big toe.
• I won't wear pantyhose even if my misinformed girlfriend, coworker, mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I tuck it there..
• If a strap breaks, I won't duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back! into place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it.
• I will not live in corn denial; rather I will lean on my good friend Dr. Scholl's if my feet need him.
• I will resist the urge to buy jelly shoes at Payless for the low, low price of $4.99 even if my feet are small enough to fit into the kids' sizes. This is out of concern for my safety, and the safety of others. No one can walk properly when standing in a pool of sweat and I would hate to take someone down with me as I fall and break my ankle.
• I will take my toe ring off toward the end of the day if my toes swell and begin to look like Vienna sausages.
• I will be brutally honest with my girlfriend/sister/coworker when she asks me if her feet are too ugly to wear sandals. Someone has to tell her that her toes are as long as my fingers and no sandal makes creepy feet look good.
• I will promise if I wear flip flops that I will ensure that they actually flip and flop, making the correct noise while walking and I will promise NOT to slide or drag my feet while wearing them. I will promise to go to my local nail salon at least once per season and have a real pedicure (they are about $20 or $25 and worth EVERY penny).
• I will promise to throw away any white/off-white sandals that show signs of wear... nothing is tackier than dirty white sandals.

This Public Service Announcement brought to you by the Ya-Ya Scrapping sisterCOUSINhood.

A FFA He Is Not

On Agriculture~

A WHILE BACK-

Mr.Yuke(5): Cows are in the milk group because they have milk in their tummies, huh mom? BUT, they're ALSO in the meat group cuz they're made out of meat. RIGHT?


THE NEXT DAY-

Mr.Yuke(5): Rabbits live on a farm cuz THEY give us carrots.


TODAY-

Mr.Yuke(5): How come we eat chickens? Cuz we just eat them AFTER they squeeze the eggs.


I'm thinking chickens may want to look into Hypnobirthing.

Spray Tans Never Looked So Good

as they do on the Wolf Pack. Drool.




Have a nice day.

The Truth About Cupid

Mr. Yuke(5) came to us this year and asked us straight out, "Dad. I want to know. Now TELL ME THE TRUTH; DOES the Easter Bunny exist?"
Us: Well, what do you think?
Mr.Yuke(5): I think it's YOU GUYS.
Us: Hmmm.... Well-
Mr.Yuke(5): Yeah. I knew it. And Santa Claus is you too.
Me: Ok. Yes. You're very smart. (He's only a baby!!!) : ( But remember the fun you had all the years you were little and you believed they were real?
Mr.Yuke(5): Yeah.
Me: Well, wouldn't it be fun for MonsterTruck(3) and Kryptonite(2) to get to believe that when they're little too?
Mr.Yuke(5): Yeah...?
Me: So it really wouldn't be nice to tell them and take that fun away. WOULD IT?. So if you do, the Easter Bunny will not bring you ANYTHING.
Mr.Yuke(5): Ok.
He goes upstairs.
Approximately 27 seconds later-
ThePinkiest(6): MOM!!!! DAD!!!! IS IT TRUE THAT YOU GUYS ARE THE EASTER BUNNY CUZ THAT'S WHAT MR.YUKE(5) SAID!!!
Us: Well, what do you think?
ThePinkiest(6) deep in thought: Are you Santa Claus too?
Us: What do you think?
ThePinkiest(6): DOES THIS MEAN THERE IS NO CUPID?!!!!
Us: ??????

Don't worry, honey. You'll still fall in love one day. I promise.

My Triumphant Return to the Internet

may not be so triumphant. Health problems (as usual). Testing being done. Details forthcoming. Suspense is killing me. Maybe other stuff too. More later, hopefully not MUCH later.

Her Morning Elegance

My very gifted friend, PhotoGirlFromCanada posted this fun video on her blog a few months ago. I watch it all the time and thought you all should too. It's only about 3 mintues and so much fun to watch. Enjoy!

My Return to the Internet

We are almost finished fixing our computer. I can FINALLY get online again!!! More to come soon....

PARTY! PARTY! PARTY!: Cumpleanos Gigantes '09!

This week was in.sane. What with all the commotion and full-term pregnancy and whatnot at the end of last year I thought it would be a good idea to celebrate LittleMommy's(10) and Mr.Yuke's(5) birthdays when things calmed down a little bit. They were good sports and agreed to this. Unfortunately, things calmed down all at the same time. I should win some kind of mommy award or something. Oh wait- I sort of did. Someone saw my MOPRAH contest entry on SeriouslySoBlessed and took pity on me, offering free baby pictures after reading my pathetic plea for stuff. Only now I feel really stupid. : ) That's ok though. I'm not going to let it stand between me and the free stuff. Anyway-

Thursday we had Mr.Yuke's(5) "birthday" party. He decided he wanted "a toaster waffle breakfast party." ("!!!!!") (He has the most interesting notions.) He invited 9 friends over to "eat toaster waffles and have a pinata and watch Speed Racer and pin the #5 on Mach 5". A good time was had by all and there was a minimum of syrup on the floor. Good thing since it was the first day of Cumpleanos Gigantes '09.

Friday we had Bubba's(8) party. He wanted to have a Jedi party again with 9 friends. I didn't think I could deal with 15 Jedis in my oh-so-tiny house, all whacking and flailing in true Jedi fashion. I discussed this with MyBeautiful. She suggested a pinata the boys could beat with their light sabers instead of each other. (I've mentioned before that she is amazing.) I settled on this idea and ordered a Darth Vader pinata. I convinced Bubba(8) that it would be REALLY FUN to have a "Jedi battle on the ice-planet Hoth" party. This would involve a battle to defeat the Empire OUTSIDE in the snow. Everyone could bring their sleds and hopefully no one would need stitches or anything. He agreed and so that's what we did. After sledding, the kids came in for hot chocolate and made their own personal pizzas. They opened presents while the pizzas baked, had dinner and then did the pinata. They watched Return of the Jedi for a while, had cake and ice cream and went home with glow stick "light sabers". It was a great party. (Thanks, MyBeautiful!)

Saturday we had LittleMommy's(10) party. She opted for a makeover night complete with teenybopper chick-flick ("Another Cinderella Story"~ a Disney channel original movie) and takeout Chinese food. We started with dinner served on china but eaten off of bee-yoo-tee-ful party plates and cups. After they had finished eating and had devoured two fortune cookies each, the 5 girls were each given a tub with towel, marbles, nail brush, water bottle, and nail buffing cube. While we watched the movie, we did foot soaks and then the girls got to choose between mani's and pedi's. I ended up doing fingers for three and toes for two. We did the works from sugar scrubs, hand soaks and cuticle treatments to footscrub that proved to be way too ticklish for little girls, and a soothing foot moisturizer. ; ) For the manicures I found this great cuticle oil that smells like cranberry. It was a huge hit. While I worked on hands and feet MyBeautiful did hair and makeup. She is an angel, that one. I had made arrangements with a professional beautician to come and do up-do's but she called me in the afternoon saying that she was sick in bed and would be unable to attend. MyBeautiful rescued me and saved the party, bringing all her stuff to do up the girls. (LOVE YOU!!!) After the movie/makeovers were finished, we had build-your-own ice cream sundaes- complete with the works including homemade hot fudge sauce and toasted coconut. It was a great party and LittleMommy's(10) friends had fun.

Sunday I recooperated and Monday I got the house ready to host my book group tonight. Tomorrow I think I'll shop for snow pants. After all, I've got my birthday ski trip planned for this weeked.... : ) Maybe in February I'll rest.